Happy Marriage Happy Life

The movie “Monster-In-Law” perfectly captures the problems a lot of people have with their in laws. In the movie, Charlotte and Kevin are engaged, but Kevin’s mother is firmly against the match and schemes to break up the relationship. She is on her best behavior around her son, and he doesn’t understand at all the intensity of the situation. Charlotte is left to deal with the nightmare almost entirely on her own, and she’s not willing to give up her man either.  Why do so many people have in-law problems? In an article titled “Creating Healthy Ties with In-Laws and Extended Families,” James M. Harper and Susanne Front Olson discuss the issue of enmeshment. When a parent and child suffer from enmeshment, they feel like they always need to be together, that they need to be first in each other’s lives, and anything other than that is a betrayal or serious offense. Enmeshment can also cause problems because the parent is likely to expect the new son or daughter-in-law to be a ...

A marriage partnership is just that – a partnership. A team. No one is supposed to be more in control than the other. Richard B. Miller, Director of the School of Family Life at Brigham Young University said that “unequal power relationships in marriage are predictive of depression.” No one wants depression to darken their marriage. So what are we to do?  In a talk titled “That We May Be One,” President Henry B. Eyring said, “At the creation of man and woman, unity for them in marriage was not given as hope, it was a command!” We need to work on being unified with our spouses. That means that no one person has all the power. I cringe when I hear people talk about how “everyone knows she’s wearing the pants,” or “I learned early on to give my wife whatever she wants and everyone is happy,” or “the most important words in a marriage are ‘whatever you say, dear.’”  My husband and I try very hard to work together on things that matter to both of us. When we move into a ...

SEX. It’s a really important part of marriage, but one that lots of people aren’t really comfortable talking about. While physical intimacy is a very personal, private thing that may not need to be discussed outside of your marriage, you should be talking about it with your partner. In a September 1986 Ensign article titled “They Twain Shall Be One,” Brent Barlow said “The inability of married couples to intimately relate to each other is one of the major causes of divorce.” We can’t just ignore this part of our marriages and hope it works itself out.  In an article from Meridian Magazine titled, “Fulfilling the Sexual Stewardship in Marriage,” Sean E. Brotherson writes about the “Four Horsemen of Sexual Fulfillment.” He says that these are ignorance, inhibition, ill will and infidelity . Many people enter a marriage relationship just plain ignorant about sex! The media doesn’t help. Most of what is portrayed in movies, books, magazines, etc is not accurate or realist...